April 2011
4 posts
HAIKUTHESEARETHEBESTTHINGSABOUTTHAILAND
MANGO STICKY RICE/
CUDDLING FUCKING TIGERS/
ELEPHANT BRONCO
HAIKUTHISBANGKOKISHOTASBALLLLLSSS
I AM HAIKUING/
IN AN INTERNET CAFE/
CAN’T LEAVE THE AC
HAIKUTHISWENTANDFELLINLOVEAGAINOOPSIES
KEEP THINKING ABOUT/
THAT PINK AND BLUE NEON BOY/
…. YOU SHOULD BE WITH ME
HAIKUTHISWASABADWEEKTOQUITSMOKING
LOST ATM CARD/
PLUS CRAZY STAPH INFECTION/
ALSO: LOSING IT
November 2010
21 posts
HAIKUTHISI'MWIDEAWAKEANDREADYTODODAMAGE
BOURBON HOT TODDIES:/
THE RESPECTABLE ADULT/
CHOICE FOR 4 LOKOS
HAIKUTHISISTILLSHOWER
SECRETLY I THINK/
THAT MY B.O. SMELLS PRETTY/
GOOD……. WE’RE ANIMALS
HAIKUTHISI'MNAKEDINMYFRIENDSBATHROOMREPEATEDLY
IT’S NOT EASY TO/
PEE AT A PARTY WEARING/
VELOUR UNITARD
HAIKUTHISMANFIXINGMYCEILINGIHATEYOU
SIMULTANEOUSLY/
TALKING TO ME LIKE I’M FIVE;/
TRYING TO FUCK ME
HAIKUTHISTHINKSSHE'SREALDEEPONMONDAYS
EVERY ACT IS A/
CHOICE, EVEN COMPLACENCY/
SO NOW WHAT TO DO
HAIKUTHESEMOROSEMONDAYS
SORRY HAIKU FOLKS/
MY MONDAY CURSE STRUCK EARLY/
ONE THIRTY AM
HAIKUTHISI'LLBEOVERITSOON
LATER REFLECTION/
REVEALS OVERLOOKED SIGNS THAT/
I BARELY KNEW YOU
HAIKUTHISDON'TWORRYIT'SJUSTMELATONIN
PICKING AT MY NAILS/
CRACK IT OPEN AND BEG FOR/
ARTIFICIAL SLEEP
HAIKUTHISWINDUPBIRD
DOWN INTO THE PIT/
CHURNING GUT, BREATH COMING FAST/
THE WELL CALLING ME
HAIKUTHISIALSOEATKALE
MY SECRET SINGLE/
BEHAVIOR. HANGOVER CURE:/
MCDONALDS BREAKFAST
HAIKUTHISIFYOUDON'TWANTMETOTAKETHEMCHOOSESOMETHINGL...
Who knew Hershey’s made/
Kisses with mint inside them?/
I can’t help myself.
HAIKUTHIS,MAYBEICANBLAMETHECATBYPAIGE
Stealing candy from/
the Boss Lady. She’ll notice/
that it’s all gone. Whoops.
HAIKUTHETEAPARTYTHOSECRAZYFUCKERS
GRIEF COUNSELORS ON/
THE HILL. LOSING YOUR JOB TO/
THE TEA PARTY SUCKS
HAIKUTHISPERFECTDISTRACTIONBYHANNAH
“INTERVENTION” HAS/
REPLACED PRODUCTIVITY./
OHH, LOOK, METH ADDICT
HAIKUTHISTIMECHANGE,LETSNAPBYHANNAH
it is dark outside/ agricultural schedule?/ time to hibernate.
HAIKUTHESEDAYONEBLUES
HIDING KINDA WORKS/
BUT I HAVE TO BE HONEST/
MONDAY STILL GOT ME
HAIKUTHOSEASTROTWINS,THEY'REWATCHINGME!
WEEKLY HOROSCOPE:/
SAYS I’M READY TO PARTY/
……BUT NO RANDOM SEX :(
HAIKUTHISI'MINHIDING
FIGURED OUT THE KEY/
TO AVOIDING MY MONDAY/
CURSE: DON’T LEAVE THE HOUSE
HAIKUBEINGA4LOKOSTATISTICBYPAIGE
hope the doc will say/
my 4 Loko related/
injury is healed
HAIKUTHISGIVEMEALOBOTOMY
CAN I FAST FORWARD/
A FEW MONTHS TO WHEN I DON’T/
NEED THIS POST DAILY?
HAIKUTHISI'LLBEGOODTOMORROW
PUT ON YOGA CLOTHES/
BUT THERE’S FREEZING RAIN OUTSIDE/
SMOKED A CIGARETTE
October 2010
4 posts
HAIKUTHISIMANAGEDTOMAKETHATSHOWEVENMOREDEPRESSING
A WORD TO THE WISE:/
DO NOT WATCH INTERVENTION/
WHILE DRINKING WHISKEY
HAIKUTHISBREAKUPSUCKS
WATCHING MY CELL PHONE/
NO CALLS FROM YOU: SEVEN DAYS/
WANT TO THROW IT OUT
HAIKUTHESELIFEDETAILS
CLEANING OUT WALLET/
TURNS OUT LICENSE EXPIRED/
FIVE MONTHS AGO…………… OOPS
HAIKUTHISNEEDSTOWRITEMOREDAMNHAIKUS
YO, WHAT’S UP TUMBLR/
FINALLY SIGNED IN AGAIN/
HAIKU IN YOUR FACE!
April 2010
19 posts
HAIKUTHISHASMISGIVINGSABOUTBEINGONREALITYTV
REALITY SHOW?/
EITHER WE LOOK INSANE OR/
JUST REALLY STUPID
HAIKUTHISICUTBACKONDRINKINGANDNOWIGETHEADACHESDAILY...
THROBBING FRONTAL LOBES/
SO HAIKU-ING UNFAIR/
HAVEN’T BEEN DRINKING
HAIKUTHISATLEASTI'MDOINGITINPANAMA!
30TH BIRTHDAY/
APPROACHING. SOME DREAD, MOSTLY/
IMMATURITY
HAIKUTHISBABYTHUG
ANY GUESSES ON/
THIS BABY’S PARENTS? FREE-RANGE?/
OR HELICOPTER?
HAIKUTHISIWANTTOSEETHESMACKDOWNONFOXNEWS
PARENTING RESEARCH:
HELICOPTER MOMS VERSUS/
FREE-RANGE KIDS. HA HA
HAIKUTHISITSAPRIL13THALREADYNOOOO
SOME MORE EVIDENCE/
THAT I’M NOT QUITE A “GROWN-UP”/
TAXES NOT DONE YET
HAIKUTHISISAFRAIDOFNATURE
BUT SERIOUSLY/
BACK TO HAIKU’S ALLERGIES/
EYES: BURNING, TEARING
HAIKUTHISFANTASYCREATUREOFCUTE
IS THIS THING FOR REAL?!/
ADORABLE EYES AND NOSE/
PLUS IT’S NAME: DIK DIK?!
ON PARENTING TRENDS:/
QUOTE: “WE’VE BEEN RAISING BRATTY/
KIDS SINCE THE 80’S”
HAIKUTHISJUSTDEVELOPEDALLERGIESANDTHEYSUCK!
I SHOULD HAVE BEEN NICE/
ABOUT MY DAD’S ALLERGIES/
CALLED HIM “BUBBLE BOY”
HAIKUTHISMAKESMEMAD
ALL WEEK LONG, YOU WACK/
OFF TO PORN, PROCRASTINATE/
FRIDAY NIGHT: “WORKING”
haikuthisarchipelagOHbyliz
once a land mass now,/
an archipelago/
made by violence.
——————
The islands separate/
Changing animals and plants./
They cannot relate.
———————
But something keeps them/
From floating into the sea/
More than gravity
Haikuthisthatissoloudihopeyourhavingfunat9am
Good morning bushwick/
Reggaeton Easter Sunday/
Neighbors partying
HAIKUTHISWANTSLOTSOFNEWSHOES
WISHFUL WEB SHOPPING/
FILLING MY VIRTUAL CART/
SADLY CLOSING TABS
HAIKUTHISATLEASTAPRIL1STISOVERNOWBYPAIGE
Hey, Universe - you/
won this round, but I’ll be on/
my toes now. Watch it.
HAIKUTHISWEEKSHOULDENDNOWBYPAIGE
Making me think that/
yesterday was Friday is/
a cruel April Fools’.
HAIKUTHISAPRILFIRST
ALREADY GOT FOOLED/
WORST DAY FOR GULLIBLE GIRL/
BELIEVES ANYTHING!
HAIKUBONETHUGSNHARMONY
IT’S THE FIRST OF THE/
MONTH, WAKE UP, GET UP, GET UP/
THUG LUV IN APRIL
HAIKUTHISPHARMACYANDGYNOWANTMEPREGNANT
IT’D BE EASIER/
TO PROCURE HEROIN OR/
CRACK THAN BIRTH CONTROL
March 2010
85 posts
HAIKUTHISAMYSEDARIS,CANWEBEFRIENDS?
AMAZING PICTURE/
CANNOT WRITE WORTHY HAIKU/
FOR AMY’S BRILLIANCE
HAIKUTHISJERSEYSHOREBLOOMBERGCOLLISION
I HAVE SOME QUESTIONS:/
WAS THIS PICTURE PHOTOSHOPPED?/
SITUATION: SHIRT?